How to handle mysterious calls … ah beng style!

Have you ever had those mysterious missed calls? Unfamiliar number that keeps calling your phone sometime right in the middle of the night? Well, I used to have such calls back then when I was using my 016 number. I tell you, those missed calls are irritating! Sometimes I don’t whether to call back or not. And when I do call back, the person on the other side of the phone will claim that he never call at all. Well, atleast that person sounded sincere to me…so I couldn’t be totally pissed with him/her. So what can I do..ignore it?

Now here’s one way to handle such irritating mysterious calls. CAUTION! THIS AUDIO IS NOT SAFE FOR WORK

This may be a set up, by its still darn hilarious! LMAO!

ahbeng: Hullo
bangla: Ya
ahbeng: Eh you fucking cibai who called this number ah 9103054
bangla: I never call you le
ahbeng: You fuck ah, today you called so many time…about six times you know
bangla: now ah?
ahbeng: ah now? ah then your father called ar?
bangla: ok ok .., I see I see later I wanna check
ahbeng: I fuck you … you stay where? you stay where? you tell me you stay where? you working where?
bangla: Then you say me for what..fuck la you kan nin no bo eh cibai bastard
ahbeng: your mother cibai you fucking here you no life ar?
bangla: I know you I wanna hantam you you fucking cibai

both: ok you stay where you stay where? bangla mumbling..I slap you mother cibai your mother cibaiyou wanna kill me you now come I kill you kannin no bu eh cibai kannin no bu eh cibai you bastard kannin no bu eh cibai fuck la kannin no bu eh cibai your mother father bastard you roti besarchinese fuck chinese fuck cibai bastard la fuckin cibai i no fuck I no fuck


ahbeng: I now call police I wanna call..I now catch your number I call police ..I wanna call your

bangla: for what I never i card..the i card i buy for me you’re going you’re
ahbeng: what card? i fuck you your father ask me buy come ar?
bangla: I .. i …ah
ahbeng: no no no i wanna report you fucking I make sure you come you dont come Singapore anymore as if you fucking bangla you another cibai indian motherfucker
bangla: har? I fuck you already I told you I wanna cancel the ..the number
ahbeng: ah why you scold me …why you scold me? you cancel..you cancel your father ar? you scold me
bangla: coz i i said i change
ahbeng: a fuck you ah now where you stay?
bangla: har? you where stay I come you where you stay I come!
ahbeng: You sure? You come Bonggol now
bangla: Har
ahbeng: Now ah you come Bonggol
bangla: Bonggol ah bonggol where?
ahbeng: Bonggol…block 107 now now you come
bangla: that new block ar?
ahbeng: fuck you lar ask your father all come la
bangla: har
ahbeng: you mother cibai you
bangla: I one man enough you dont talk so much..I one man I …30 person 5 person 10 person dont care
ahbeng: you come 10 20 men i oso no scared la
bangla: you i tell you I real sorry sorry you wanna to fuck me people for what? you tell me?
ahbeng: ofcoz what you call me I fuck you la what…
bangla: you tell me you wanna er…instead of fucking fucking cibai for what…this one..you cannot telle me this one..talk to nicely people..let ppl understand
ahbeng: eh fuck you la , talk nicely you call me 6 time I talk to you nicely
bangla: this number last time use a my friend ..fuck I dont know that he gonna go back already
ahbeng: I fuck your friend la I dont care your friend, your father or your mother use I oso dont care, as long as you dont care this number? why you call 6 times?
bangla: okok i wanna…
ahbeng: you find you find prostitute ar? you think prostitue use this number? your friend girl ar?
bangla: no la no la
ahbeng: ah then why you call call call call ah?
bangla: No la no la
ahbeng: you fucking cibai bangla
bangla: I now I now I see I wanna cancel this number ok i think
ahbeng: You fucking make sure you cancel ah ..one more time I make sure one more time you call I make sure I kill you…your whle family all die ah..I tell you ah..I gangster ah…I tell you ah…
bangla: dont worry..I never give to I see buy from this one ok?
ahbeng: Make sure ar..
bangla: I keep the sing dollar I done promise one card..
ahbeng: ok you fucking make sure you dont call ok ah.. I see ah
bangla: ok ok..
ahbeng: ok ar..one more time you call ah..
bangla: ok today I wanna cancel ah this number
ahbeng: Then you must say sorry to me now..
bangla: ok I cannot talk already I I keep repeat I sorry already
ahbeng: I dont wanna talk so much I want you say sorry can already
bangla: ok ok ..sorry sorry.. i i wanna cancel the number now..
ahbeng: ah…say very very sorry
bangla: oh okok ..sorry sorry sorry…
ahbeng: okok
bangla: okok

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    69 Comments »

    Comment by sotong
    2005-09-15 07:57:49

    hehehehe… so funny!!!

     
    Comment by Dee
    2005-09-15 08:41:22

    ROFL…that was funny shit.

     
    Comment by centerpide
    2005-09-15 08:52:12

    next to the SARS song,…this is the funniest audio shit i’ve heard!!! lol

     
    Comment by aMy
    2005-09-15 15:10:43

    u stay where har har?! u work where har har?! ……. i wan u say sorry now… LOL where the hell u get that kor?

     
    Comment by jimmy
    2005-09-15 15:17:28

    where did you found that file?

     
    Comment by galvin
    2005-09-15 15:52:55

    I actually got it from 2 sources. A friend sent me a link to a site and I’ve received forwarded emails of the audio file too.

     
    Comment by kaikon
    2005-09-15 16:56:29

    That could be Ashraf

     
    Comment by jack0
    2005-09-15 17:17:46

    vulgar all de way.. sweet.. lolx

     
    Comment by kimberlycun
    2005-09-15 17:45:58

    ahahaha cannot stop laughing whey

     
    Comment by FireAngel
    2005-09-15 18:12:25

    WHAT THE FUCK

     
    Comment by Beng
    2005-09-15 18:29:36

    Did I hear roti-prata somewhere???

     
    Comment by Jasper Chen
    2005-09-15 20:41:17

    Hey I cannot hear anything. The chao cheebye file won’t load! Ahhh…

     
    Comment by shireen k
    2005-09-16 00:38:42

    yeah i hear roti prata somewhere too…. galv.. u must have listen to it.. THAT much times huh

     
    Comment by jbasil
    2005-09-16 07:07:27

    I think their mouths were full of roti prata or something from the sound of it. ouch.

     
    Comment by Ann
    2005-09-16 09:07:05

    wah biang eh…
    damn funny leh…
    I will never look at Prata the same way again.

     
    Comment by bohemianlisa
    2005-09-16 10:18:01

    haha. Damn funny. Laughed until I got slightly asthmatic… heh.

     
    Comment by -.-
    2005-09-16 13:10:42

    poor thing that indian guy.he jus gt the wrong number n tio fucked til lik that.racism

     
    Comment by anonymuis
    2005-09-16 13:49:18

    what’s so funny, weird english

     
    Comment by pukiindianlord
    2005-09-16 20:28:30

    hokkien poeple are the best

     
    Comment by A fan of this website
    2005-09-16 22:52:16

    haha… nice and cartoon webbby… hehe… keep up the gd work… hehe… Ho seh la… haha!!

     
    Comment by w3s
    2005-09-17 17:22:18

    Hey, I’ve got the same file too.

    I’ve posted it yesterday evening. Found it in some guy’s blog. He used that as his “Background Music.”

    Didn’t intend 2 copy fr u, dude. (As I didn’t view ur page until today) Anyway, it was definitely an interesting conversation. That Indian guy could have ended the conversation at the initial stage. Its just a click away anyway.

     
    Comment by Jason
    2005-09-17 23:15:25

    Whoa, that is some racist stuff there.

     
    Comment by air
    2005-09-20 14:21:54

    hahaha
    madness!

     
    Comment by Skeletoned
    2005-09-27 22:13:27

    Woah, even foreigners know local vulgarities.. cool…. haha!

     
    Comment by woohoo!
    2005-09-29 01:12:07

    Local v Bangla,awesome!

     
    Comment by mq
    2005-09-30 02:48:58

    pls dont be racist. all humans have feelings man.

    if this conversation really happened (not staged), then i think its too much from the local fellow man.

    i hope that his dick rots. bless his balls.

     
    Comment by CB beng
    2005-10-02 14:35:54

    knn this ccb beng too free nothing to do go disturb people create trouble.
    pcb as mq said hope that his dick rots. i dont bless his balls but press his balls

     
    Comment by centerpide
    2005-10-03 23:41:11

    I have to agree with mq…but I think it was staged…cuz if you notice at the end…he demanded that the foreigner apologize to him many times….that kinda gave me the hint that it was staged, cuz who on earth would say ” say you very very soryy” if they’re really mad and pissed? it was staged if you ask me

     
    Comment by KAYA
    2005-10-06 16:51:09

    COOL,,,,,IM COOL………FUCKING CHI BAI !!!!!
    SO COOL THEN U THINK I HOT AR? KAN NI NA,CHI BAI,
    ANIMAL FUCKER!!!

     
    Comment by xorpheus
    2005-10-06 19:22:06

    Hi,
    Just happen to surf pass your blog.No offence.
    Funny audio clip u got there.
    Cheers.

     
    Comment by karebu
    2005-10-06 23:11:05

    I think everyone should call 91403054 :)

     
    Comment by karebu
    2005-10-06 23:15:58

    and say,

    EH YOU CB, BULLY MY FREN, I HAMTUM YOU. DOWNSTAIRS ALREADY. AT BONGGOL. BLK 107.

     
    Comment by Arniki
    2005-10-08 11:23:15

    Lol .. Darn Funny Clip ….

     
    Comment by MerCury
    2005-10-10 16:46:20

    hmmm galvin,
    it seems funny to me.
    but hope you know you are putting yaself at risk. Hmm the internet is no longer safe.

    esp with the 2 cases. jail anyone?

     
    Comment by MerCury
    2005-10-10 16:48:05

    hmm oops. u are in malaysia huh.

    my mistake
    hahah continue continue.

     
    Comment by Bangla2
    2005-10-23 01:56:37

    eh u dun farking bully my friend k.. i is lawyer i tell u k..

     
    Comment by nails for breakfast
    2005-10-26 16:55:10

    racism does exist. well, its true that some of these banglah workers are idiots but there are alot of really smart ones. its just that immature bastards tend to stereotype. thats fucking annoying.

     
    Comment by Vin, KNN BO CB WTF?
    2005-10-30 23:19:56

    So contradictory haha, how to f*ck your mom but your mom no cb?! HAHA (conclusion:anal) rofl

    A damn racist clip, shit, must give it that, but still, a good clip.

    I might add that centrepide said some truth there, tho might not be staged, I dunno, but has some elements of it.

     
    Comment by Vin, KNN BO CB WTF?!
    2005-10-30 23:24:12

    lol, heard it three times, YOUR MOTHER FATHER ROTI PRATHA, HAHA, must hear, round the 1:00min mark…

    lol enjoy peeps..

     
    Comment by Vin, KNN BO CB WTF?!
    2005-10-30 23:33:22

    hey, did anyone of you hear some background voices in the clips? in the start middle and the end? can anyone decipher it? lol, this clip definitely sounds like a set up now… cuz I heard sumone say knn bo cb first then the bangla guy said it… wierd…

     
    Comment by Wakashi
    2005-10-31 19:19:35

    Hahaha…..!!!!!! aneh ngam eh….ah beng pun hokkien lang wor…..wa pun chio kao wa si liao…!!!!hahaha!!!!!! damn funny lar guys..!!! eh anyway i heard a story about ah beng don even noe how to fuck a girl haha…….nvm!!!don wanna talk alot….anyway compliments GOOD JOB…..haha =)

     
    Comment by Wakashi
    2005-10-31 19:20:49

    can do more jokes like dis or not……make more i wanna hear it……eh sai boh…tolong lar……!!!!!!

     
    Comment by crazybaby
    2005-11-25 13:59:45

    GAHS > so darn furnie lorhs hahahas

     
    Comment by meiqii
    2005-12-02 01:28:02

    LOL dam shit la.. SO FUNNY.. LAUGHING MY ARSE OFF..

     
    Comment by atakol
    2005-12-06 01:34:36

    alamak..this is siok men!!!

     
    Comment by IreNe Piggy
    2005-12-22 00:38:02

    tat is shittt!! fucker right haha tat was very funny!!!

     
    Comment by suchda
    2006-01-16 13:58:38

    rofl dam funny i tink i gonna call 91403054

     
    Comment by xiiao_grace
    2006-02-18 12:54:24

    tat so funni lol.. euu fuckin ci bai bangla.. basturd,., keke.. lught until stomach cramp liAo lol..

     
    Comment by LeEn-
    2006-02-25 20:20:40

    muahaha..u come bonggol..u come bonggol now..

     
    Comment by bangla
    2006-03-10 21:37:43

    FUCKING AHBENG CHI BYE AH U MOTHER FUCKING ASS LA

     
    Comment by mother_fucked
    2006-03-15 09:16:18

    send me the song not

     
    Comment by lanjiao
    2006-03-20 23:48:03

    sian nia … tis where got nice .. i show u 1 nicer 1

     
    Comment by LRJ
    2006-03-21 17:36:32

    can tell me the link for that file??

     
    Comment by Kaiser
    2006-04-05 16:31:39

    Fuck the ah beng ..

     
    Comment by M@r0R!
    2006-04-14 02:03:21

    Lmao…this was rox!!Damn that Ah Beng la!

     
    Comment by john
    2006-04-16 15:22:01

    can send me that thing.. very nice sia

     
    Comment by thelazychicken93
    2006-04-26 16:28:22

    noo leh, i heard sth lyk lollipop leh…..

     
    Comment by Ervin Sethi
    2006-04-26 20:55:01

    The real one is:

    AB: Ah Beng
    B: Bangla

    AB calling B.
    AB: Not calling ah, really ah? Record leh, record buay? Speaker kong ah?

    B pick up phone.

    B: Hello?
    AB: Hello!
    B: Yah?
    AB: Eh you fucking jibai who call this number ah 91403054?
    B: I never call you leh.
    AB: You fuck ah. Today you call how many times, about six times you know!
    B: Now ah?
    AB: Ah. Now then when, your father call ah?
    B: Ok ok I see I see later I go and check.
    AB: I fuck you ah, you stay where, you stay where, you tell me you stay where, you working where?
    B: Then you say me for what huh, ka ni na bu jibai bastard!
    AB: You mother jibai you fucking hell ah.
    B: I know you, I hantam you fucking jibai you, you stay where you tell me I now come ah.
    AB: Ok you stay where, you stay where, you mother jibai palak pundek!
    B: You tell me you stay where, ka ni na bu jibai.
    AB: Pundek you ah, you mother jibai, you mother jibai inside kosong!
    B: Where you, where you stay I come now and see you, ka ni na bu jibai bastard.
    AB: You bastard ah, you mother all bastard ah, your mother bastard ah, your mother father ah, sell roti prata you.
    B: Fuck you lah sama dia, you Chinese bastard, Chinese bastard lah fucking jibai.
    AB: I now call, I now call police ah.
    B: YOU STAY WHERE?!?
    AB: I catch your number call police ah.
    B: HUH?!?
    AB: I want to call your foreman come.
    B: For what, I never check the IC I want the Hi-card I buy for me. You stupid.
    AB: What card?
    B: I never take your pay!
    AB: I fuck you ah, your father ask me money buy card ah.
    B: I buy the Hi-card.
    AB: No no no no no, I want to report ah, you fucking ah, I make sure you come don’t come Singapore anymore you fucking Bangla, mother jibai India motherfucker.
    B: HUH?!? I told you already, I want to cancel this number!
    AB: Then why you scold me, why you scold me, you cancel you cancel your father ah. You scold me? I fuck you ah now where you stay?
    B: HUH?!? You stay where tell me I come! You stay where tell me I come!
    AB: You sure? You come Punggol now!
    B: HUH?!?
    AB: Now I, you come Punggol.
    B: Punggol ah, Punggol where?
    AB: Punggol, Block 107 now, now you come.
    B: The new be-lock(block) ah?
    AB: Fuck you ah ask your father all come ah!
    B: HUH?!?
    AB: You mother jibai you.
    B: I one man enough? You don’t talk so much ah, I one person you three person five person seven person don’t care you know.
    AB: You come ten twenty men I also don’t scared ah!
    B: I tell you, I tell you already uncle, sorry sorry, you want to fuck me people for what you tell me.
    AB: Of course what, you call me I fuck you ah, what? You call me for what?
    B: I tell you, you tell me so far you, instead of fucking fucking jibai for what? This one you cannot tell me people, talk to nicely people, so people understand!
    AB: Talk to you nicely? Eh fuck you ah talk nicely, you call me six times I talk to you nicely ah, hah?!?
    B: This number last time use ah my friend, but I don’t know that he want to go back already.
    AB: I fuck your friend ah! I don’t care your friend, your father, your mother use I also don’t care. As long you don’t call this number, why you call six time? You find prostitute ah, you think prostitute use this number your friend girl ah?
    B: No lah, no lah.
    AB: Ah then why you call call call call call ah?
    B: No lah, no lah.
    AB: You fucking jibai Bangla!
    B: I now I now I see I want to cancel the this number ok I think.
    AB: You fucking make sure you cancel ah one more time I make sure one more time you call ah I make sure I kill you ah you whole family all die ah, I tell you, I gangster I tell you ah. Ah.
    B: Don’t worry I never give to Hi-card I never buy to this one ok?
    AB: Make sure ah!
    B: I keep the, I keep the 15 dollar I buy for me one card.
    AB: Ok you fucking make sure you don’t call ah, ok ah I see ah, one more time you call ah, ah!
    B: Ok, I today want to cancel the this number.
    AB: Then you must say sorry to me now.
    B: Ok, I thought solved already already I talk to sorry ok.
    AB: I don’t want talk so much I want you say sorry can already, now you say sorry.
    B: Okok sorry, I I I want to cancel this number now.
    AB: Ah, say very very sorry!
    B: Okok, sorry sorry sorry.
    AB: Okok
    B: Okokok.

    THE END

    I found out myself.

     
    Comment by *bloody killer*
    2006-05-04 15:15:44

    chiby i hav real 1 la this fake 1 i hav the song too u noob no cake la go home sleep

     
    Comment by go fuck
    2006-05-05 19:26:02

    the bangla don’t noe wats fuck arh?>>>>sex

     
    Comment by go fuck
    2006-05-05 19:26:37

    fuk fuk fuk chi bai chi bai chi bai>>>Ha hahahaa

     
    Comment by =bLiSSofSoRRoWZZ=
    2006-05-05 19:39:45

    …..this is luvly shit….=)

     
    2006-05-12 02:06:06

    calling all bangla!!!!!!!!!!!!a motherf*cker ah beng called me yesterday n scold me a” f*cking bangla” i need all of yur help to hamtam the ah beng up !!!!!!!!!!!!so meet me at bonggol blok 107 tonite to to slap the cibai

     
    Comment by cibaiiii
    2006-06-05 11:00:39

    very cibai la
    kiung pu…..

     
    Comment by bangla
    2006-06-08 14:57:26

    fuck u ah beng

     
    Comment by Legaia
    2006-06-17 19:59:13

    Hope we can find other audio similar to this one

     
    Comment by Lee Kuan Yew The Bastard
    2006-07-03 14:11:41

    Stupid Singaporean chinese … the whole Singaporean chinese ancestry are bastards

     
    Comment by COOKIE
    2006-10-22 19:36:21

    how to get can send me?

     
    Comment by gunlock
    2006-11-28 15:26:19

    suck!! so funny!!!

     
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